


Finding Mina

by trashfortwice



Series: Fix You [3]
Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medical, F/F, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Smut, smut later wink wink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-23
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-09-24 16:21:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20361475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashfortwice/pseuds/trashfortwice
Summary: Where in the world is Myoui Mina?Chaeyoung is in search for the woman who broke her heart.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Part III of Fix You.
> 
> Hello! I'm back! This is a rather long chapter (is it? It felt long while writing haha). It'll make up for the short chapter that comes after this (or the next one, i forget lol). It feels a bit messy because I wanted to get so much done in the chapter T.T I hope you don't mind.
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading my stories. I've received a lot of love for the series and it makes me all giddy inside haha!
> 
> Let me know what you think of the story so far! I love reading your comments. Don't be shy and slip into my dm's on twitter @ trash_for_twice. That sound inappropriate but I mean it in the best way possible. We can discuss about the story and any criticism you may have! Haha!

“Are you going to open it or what?” Nayeon asked curiously.

Chaeyoung placed the sealed envelope on the table in the cafe they were staying. It was Chaeyoung’s favorite because it had this vintage vibe to it. The place always seemed to give her comfort and it suited her style. It was relatively empty though, but at midnight, who would be having coffee besides university students? 

It was a plain looking envelope. There was nothing written or printed on it except for Chaeyoung’s name and address. No return address either. Just stamped with a wax seal. She stared at it, dumbfounded. Nayeon snapped her fingers to bring her back to reality.

“Sorry,” Chaeyoung said, “It’s been a few weeks.”

“Shut up, I know you know exactly how many days it has been,” Nayeon rolled her eyes.

It had been exactly fifteen days without Mina and no trace of her until today. She left no way to contact her. Not her mobile number. All SNS she had were inactive. No response from her email. Her home and office were as she left them, collecting dust and unpaid rent probably. The only thing Chaeyoung was left with was a note on her nightstand the night she disappeared.

_ Hi Chaeng, _

_ I know this seems out of the blue. But you know I've been going through some things. I know I look fine on the outside. But there's just something so wrong about me and I can't fix it no matter how hard I try. I can't bring this upon you, Chaeng. I love you. I need to sort things out on my own. I’m sorry. _

  
  


_ Love, _

_ Mina _

Chaeyoung kept that note, pinned it to her cork board in the studio and looked at every single day. She'd been obsessing over finding Mina. Her trail had gone cold until today when the letter arrived in the mail. Oddly old school and quite unlike Mina to do something like this.

Her first course of action was to run to Mina's place that night. But she wasn't there. Some of her things were gone, not just the kind of things you'd bring if you were in a rush to leave like a few clothes. Nope. She brought a number of medical books, judging from the empty spaces on her bookshelf. Her coffee maker was gone too, which was very characteristic of Mina but totally impractical. But she left her laptop though which was odd. Chaeyoung looked through it hoping to find a clue as to where she might be. But the search history was cleared and no relevant files were saved. She'd cleaned everything out.

Chaeyoung went to her office where there were even less hints. Her colleagues were equally clueless.

_ "She never said she was leaving," Sana said. Chaeyoung had never seen Sana sad before, not that she saw her often, but she looked like a lost puppy that needed petting or belly rubbing, "It's not like Mina to drop everything." _

She was right. Mina was not the type to give up on life in any sense or aspect of it. But Chaeyoung had nowhere else to go, nowhere else to pick up Mina's trail.

Nayeon took the letter, “If you’re not going to open it, I will.” She raised her arm up high enough that Chaeyoung couldn’t reach it. She tried.

_ Damn my short arms and short legs. I’m just small, okay? _

Why were they like this? So childish. Nayeon was older than her but acted like an annoying little sister at times. This was one of those times. She stuck her tongue out at Chaeyoung and was about to lift the seal. The fact that it had a wax seal was admittedly fancy. She handed it to Chaeyoung, laughing so much at how desperate she was at trying to retrieve the letter.

She swiped it harshly from Nayeon and held it with both hands, staring at it nervously. Before Nayeon could try to steal it again, Chaeyoung unstuck the seal and flipped the envelope fold open. Her heart raced when she saw the light green stationery, neatly folded and tucked inside.

The letter was rather short, much to Chaeyoung’s disappointment. She had hoped for a lengthy explanation as to why she left and where she was. Maybe even a dirty picture or whatever.  _ A girl can dream, right? _

_ Hi Chaeng, _

_ How are you? Handwritten letters are romantic, right? Admit it, you’re a sucker for these things. It’s old school, I know. I wanted to talk to you somehow but I don’t want you to look for me. This is the best way I know how. I don’t know when this will reach you but as of writing, it has been ten days since I left. Have you been counting? I secretly want you to but I hope you’re not. I really miss you, Chaeng. I want to say “I want you to move on. Find a better girl who can be everything you want and need.” but I can’t. I want to be that girl for you. But I can’t hold it against you if you hate me. I’m a coward for leaving and I’m sorry. I love you and I hope you’re doing well. _

  
  


_ Love, _

_ Mina _

“What does it say? Let me read. I want to analyze with you,” Nayeon peeked from behind Chaeyoung’s shoulder. She sighed and Nayeon knew better than to intrude but she read the letter anyway since Chaeyoung stood still with the contents in full display.

She sat back down on the wooden chair and buried her face in her arms, crossed on the table. Her eyes were dry, she was tired of crying or perhaps she ran out of tears. She wanted answers, not an apology, not excuses. She wanted Mina to come back and tell her she loved her. That she was okay. That whatever she was going through, they could go through together. That was what she thought the whole time they were together since the incident. That somehow she was helping her get better. Did she not care for Mina enough?

“It’s not what you wanted?” Nayeon asked as she patted Chaeyoung’s head.

“I don’t understand,” said Chaeyoung, her voice muffled.

“Hey, come on. She’ll come back. At least you know she’s alive as of how many days ago?”

“Five.”

“There. Now, chin up! We have to get to work.”

*

It was the dead of winter. Chaeyoung thought about how cold it was and how Mina hated it. Maybe she went off somewhere warm and cozy. She wandered the streets aimlessly. It was still early but night had begun to fall. Perhaps it was by muscle memory or some sort of unexplainable force or just the fact that she really missed Mina, but she found herself outside of her condo again. She shuffled her feet into the snow as she approached the building. The receptionist didn’t bother waiting for Chaeyoung’s question and just said Mina hadn’t returned and there were no letters. Nothing. She let her go up to the unit since it was technically still Mina’s as per contract.

Everything was as she left it since the last time she visited. Maybe it was a strange habit but she started cleaning the place. Just the surfaces of things. So that when Mina would return, everything would not be covered in dust or cobwebs or anything. But it didn’t get very dusty in the winter. Just cold.

She never went through Mina’s things because she respected her personal space but also because she would probably kill Chaeyoung. She thought she had gone insane, waiting for Mina and cleaning her home when she might not even come back. No, she pushed those thoughts aside. It wasn’t even that dirty. She noticed a book on the shelf. It stood out from her collection of medical pedias.

_ I promise I’ll put it back. _

It was an old photo album with pictures from when Mina was in high school and Chaeyoung burst into laughter at how adorable she was. She didn’t even sport her full bangs then and her whole forehead was on display. Oh, God, did Chaeyoung miss Mina.

She had always been really slim too probably had to keep a diet since she was a ballerina and all. She always had that gummy smile. A lot of the photos were posed and taken during school events. Though she wondered who took them since she didn’t live with her parents in Korea and only her aunt was here. She didn’t think her aunt would go through the trouble of going to these events. A girl was always with her in the pictures. She had the kind of sunny smile that made you smile with her. She looked so bubbly in the pictures with her long brown hair, arm always linked to Mina’s. She didn’t realize it until she found their graduation pictures, but the smaller girl who was always next to Mina was Park Jihyo. Director Park Jihyo and Mina were best friends in highschool.

And then she had an idea.

*****

Since Mina's unexpected departure, her surgery team had temporarily transferred to other teams, dissolving their little circle. It was mostly felt by Sana and Tzuyu who had less time for each other since the latter moved to the branch hospital. She feared it to be somewhat of a downgrade but she got more hands on experience the head hospital couldn't provide. There weren't as many doctors and nurses and she had to do  _ everything _ . The experience itself was enriching, humbling, and novel but, God, was it exhausting.

For Sana, she was just getting more and more frustrated (in a lot of aspects) at how little she got to see Tzuyu in the week. Reduced to weekends and video calls, she felt so clingy and needy when Tzuyu was obviously too tired at the end of the day to converse with her but did so nonetheless. She loved her too much, Sana would like to assume.

They were practically in a relationship that they both acknowledged but never spoke of. Holding hands in public and kissing each other goodnight as Sana dropped Tzuyu home after a date. Yes, because Sana was prideful and the older one so she insisted on being one taking care of Tzuyu despite it being out of the way sometimes. Tzuyu thought it was impractical.

"Oh, my favorite," Momo said sarcastically as she set her tray down the cafeteria table, ogling the mysterious looking meat in a red sauce, the mysterious looking vegetables in a green sauce and the steaming cup of rice, “Do you think Mina will be back any time soon?”

Sana didn't respond, lost in her mysterious meat and vegetables. She'd been "distracted" for days, getting lost in the most mundane of tasks. Thankfully, she hadn't had any accidental mistakes in the operating room, especially since she was no longer working with Mina.

"Hey, Sa-tan, what's the matter, huh?" Momo asked while swinging her hand around in front of Sana's field of vision, "You seem a bit off lately."

She blinked too many times in the two seconds it took Momo to bring her back to the hospital cafeteria.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly, "I've been... distracted. I don’t know when Mina will be back. She really should have said something."

Momo nodded in agreement with her thoughts about Mina but she seemed more interested in Sana’s distractions, "So, what’s keeping you distracted? Tzuyu's not around. Shouldn't you be more focused at work?" Momo asked while chowing down on her meal, making disgusted faces.

"I am! Work is all I think about  _ while _ I'm working," Sana exclaimed as she crossed her arms, rolling her eyes, "Maybe distracted isn't the right word. Frustrated?"

Momo nodded and scooped up some rice on her spoon, "Okay, I get it."

"Get what?"

"You're not getting any."

Sana flicked Momo's forehead.

"Hey!" Momo pouted, "Well, am I wrong?"

Her cheeks turned red and it was unlike Sana to shy away from these conversations. But the object of her desire was Tzuyu. Sweet, little (?) Tzuyu who was so pure and innocent and more than just a mere "object of desire".

"Well, yeah, okay, fine. It's true. We just haven't had time. I don't even know if, you know, she's ready or if she wants it," Sana thought out loud.

"Okay, first of all, how could she not want you? She’s kind of dense but not blind. I can’t imagine you staying still either. You probably drop a wink every two seconds,” she snorted, “But have you talked about it with her? A healthy relationship is built on a solid foundation of open communication," Momo explained as she finished up her lunch while Sana had barely touched her tray, "I mean Dahyun and I, we talk about what we should and shouldn't do in bed, like if she wants to try to--"

"Okay, I'll stop you right there," Sana protested, putting her hand up and looking away, trying not to imagine Dahyun and Momo getting freaky (it was too late for that now). She gave Momo her lunch instead, which she took willingly. How she maintained her figure with that appetite was something Sana would have to ask her some other day.

Sana  _ was _ frustrated though. Not that she couldn't get the job done herself. She convinced herself it was the hormones which come around that time of the month. But that had passed and she was still needy.

Last weekend, Sana and Tzuyu went out shopping for dog clothes for the latter's Pomeranian pup in Taiwan. She'd be going home the next weekend and Sana would have to suffer in agony with her lonesome self. Sana picked out little dog shoes and showed Tzuyu.

_ "Tzu! Look at these tiny things!" Sana giggled excitedly as she raised them up for Tzuyu to see. _

_ "Oh! I saw a sweater to match with that," Tzuyu remarked as she tiptoed and stretched her arm up to pick up one of the dog clothes hanging above them. Sana stared at the flash of Tzuyu's fairly tanned skin that peeked out just above her jeans, the little dimples on her lower back showing. She felt herself getting hot at the view… in the department store… surrounded by adorable pet clothes and accessories… the most non-sexual of things. _

_ She licked her lips and started panting at the thought of herself running her hands on Tzuyu's back and digging her nails in her skin and cupping her -- _

_ "Hey, are you okay? You look a little flushed. Are you sick?" Tzuyu asked after she retrieved the little blue sweater. She reached out to touch Sana’s neck with the back of her hand but the contact made everything worse. _

_ Sana breathed out her mouth and fanned herself with her hand, "It's just a little stuffy, yeah?" _

_ "It's the middle of winter, Sana." _

*

"Hi, Director Park Jihyo-nim," Chaeyoung greeted as she entered her office, her excessive use of honorifics making the other woman chuckle quietly, "Thank you for lending me an ounce of your time."

"How can I help you, Chaeyoung?" Jihyo asked earnestly.

"Ah. Well, I wouldn't come to you if I weren't desperate. But would you happen to know of Mina's whereabouts?" Chaeyoung asked, keeping a very formal tone and posture.

Jihyo gave a blank, unreadable expression as she tapped the table, "She told me she would be on an indefinite leave. Not much else. I didn't pry."

"Oh," was all Chaeyoung could say, losing yet another sliver of hope. What kind of HR Department did they have that just let Mina on an indefinite leave without reason she wondered. But she had this gut feeling that Jihyo knew more than she led on but she would just throw herself off the bridge if she got on the director's bad side, "Well, okay. Thank you, Director Park Jihyo-nim."

Chaeyoung turned around, about to leave the office when Jihyo spoke, "She's like that. Give her time."

She looked longingly at the distance, outside of her office window where the snow-covered streets of Seoul bustled. There was definitely something on her mind. Chaeyoung asked, "She'd done this before?"

"A long time ago, yes," Jihyo answered, "I'll say this though," Chaeyoung's ears perked up at her words, "If you manage to get her back to reality and keep her here, you're really special."

If this was how Jihyo gave feedback to her staff, they would probably be very confused. Chaeyoung assumed it was a positive comment but it wasn't what she was looking for. Still no clues.

"Do you know where she might be?" Chaeyoung finally asked. The question was burning in her mind.

"To where she needs to be."

_ Goddamn it, Director Park Jihyo-nim! _

Jihyo continued, "She goes off on her own sometimes. I suppose this has been the longest time she's been away. I never know where she goes, or if she goes to the same place. I'm sorry I don't have the answers you're looking for. But I trust that she will return… sooner or later."

"Do you miss her?" The question caught Jihyo off guard.

"I do," Jihyo smiled, the kind one would make when thinking of fond memories. But there was something else in her smile, it held a certain weight that hung over her shoulders heavily.

Chaeyoung left Jihyo’s office, dragging her feet as she made her way out. Her trail went cold again.

*

_ Hi Chaeng, _

_ I’m sorry I’m writing to you again. I’ve been writing a lot. I have a lot of unsent mail for you. I’ll let them burn before you get the chance to read them haha. It’s a bit embarrassing how much I miss you.  _

_ I’m sorry I’m not making this easier for you to move on. In a way, I hope my letters don’t reach you. As of writing this, it has been twenty days since I left. Missing you has been the hardest part about leaving. But I need to do this.  _

_ I hope you’re doing well, getting all the shoots you’ve been dreaming about and traveling to new places you never imagined. I still love you. _

  
  


_ Love, _

_ Mina _

This was the second letter Chaeyoung received from Mina. She didn’t want to move on. She couldn’t.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, hey, I updated haha. This chapter has a bit more SaTzu than most people would probably like. But I hope it balances out the emotions and ish we've been feeling haha. 
> 
> Again, Thank you, fam! Appreciate the comments and support!

“When we were at the club, Tzu,” Sana asked as she stirred her hot choco by the counter while Tzuyu sipped from her milk tea (why she liked drinking a cold beverage in this weather was beyond Sana), “were you ready to go all the way?”

She choked and Sana thought the pearls were about to shoot out of Tzuyu’s nose. The younger woman coughed violently and Sana had to pat her back, trying to hold back her laugh. Tzuyu wiped a tear that escaped her eye and coughed a bit more before collecting herself, “I’m sorry, what?”

“When we were in the bathroom at the club and your hands were all over me--”

“As if  _ your  _ hands weren’t reaching places.”

“I didn’t say they weren’t,” Sana giggled, “But I was just wondering. I know you were trying to exact revenge or whatever. That's what you were doing, right? What if I didn't stop, Tzu? What if we just kept going at it?"

Tzuyu gulped and wiped her nose with a tissue. It was probably the excess milk tea dripping but Sana thought of how fitting a nosebleed would be in this context. She found it cute when Tzuyu got flustered and nervous. But even so, she could not get rid of her sinful thoughts no matter how hard she tried to brush them away with information about the left atrial appendage occlusion or septal myectomy.

"Well?" Sana prodded as they proceeded outside the shop.

"I don't know… I wasn't thinking straight," Tzuyu said, avoiding Sana's eyes.

"Not when your lips were biting mine, you weren't," Sana laughed and Tzuyu shushed her.

"I don't know how to lie, Sana, you know that,” Tzuyu cleared her throat, “I would have probably stopped you if we went too far."

"Define far."

Tzuyu was practically red with embarrassment, "Ah. I think you'd know, Sana."

Sana giggled as she rested her elbows on the railing as they overlooked the city from the small hill the shop was situated, "So how far would you go now? Now that we're technically… together. We are, right? We never officially talked about this."

She was usually so unfazed by everything. She always had a quip or remark in reply to Sana. But for once, Tzuyu was at a loss for words.

"Yes... Yes, we are… right?" Tzuyu laughed nervously and Sana nodded with a wide smile. It was an awkward conversation to have but she supposed they needed it, "Okay, good. Because I've been referring to you as my girlfriend in my head for some time now. And how far I would go  _ now _ would depend."

"On what?" Sana asked curiously, her heart beating fast in her chest, anticipating her answer.

Tzuyu grabbed the collar of Sana's blouse and pulled her in for a quick kiss. This took Sana by surprise. Never was Tzuyu the first to initiate physical affection, except for that night at the club, and never was she this forward (though Sana would admit this was a good change). Tzuyu whispered, her lips barely leaving their place, "Depends on how far you'll take me."

*

Another one of her bright ideas. 

Chaeyoung looked through the telephone directory, researched on the internet and bothered Jihyo yet again to get the information she needed. She found Mina’s aunt living in Korea. The house was small, cozy, just sitting outside of the city. It was an old  _ hanok  _ house, with a small courtyard in the middle. There were plants surrounding it and she imagined Mina living here when she was younger. Chaeyoung would have loved to take pictures but that would have been weirdly inappropriate.

Her aunt placed a tea set on the table and sat across her on the floor, pouring her a cup before speaking, “So, you’re a good friend of Mina’s, right?”

_ I’m her girlfriend. _

Chaeyoung cleared her throat, “Yes. She left her home in the city and I can’t find or contact her. Would you happen to know where she is?” Chaeyoung asked, darting her eyes in places where Mina might hide. Under the table, in the closet, inside that potted plant?

The elderly woman in front of her was probably in her sixties, living alone with a dog and a cat. She looked rather healthy and happy with her life. She even had pictures of Mina around. Mina must have been loved by this woman to a great extent. She wasn’t even her daughter but she kept little things around that reminded her of her niece. 

She shook her head as she blew her tea, “I’m sorry, dear, but she hasn’t come to me as of late.”

“Oh…” Chaeyoung trailed off, staring at the green tea and the smoke coming from it.

“She’ll be back. I used to worry a lot during the times she ran off.”

This was the second time someone mentioned Mina leaving. She wondered what these people meant. Why were they so cryptic?

“What do you mean, ma’am?”

Mina’s aunt continued, “When Mina was growing up, she liked to keep to herself. I can imagine why. When her parents separated, she wanted nothing to do with them. She had no one to talk to. No one could console her. I found out she ran away after her mother left. She spent Lord knows how many nights homeless. Her parents found her in the public library. Her mother and I agreed to bring her here, perhaps time and space away from her parents would do her good. She didn’t want to come with me,” she looked longingly at a photograph on the wall. It was of her and Mina in a school event. Scholastic Mina smiled holding a certificate in front of her. They both looked truly happy, "Oh, she probably doesn't want me telling you all this."

Chaeyoung smiled and placed her hand atop hers, "I would like to hear more, ma'am. I want to better understand her."

She continued, the nostalgia filled her eyes and her voice. The stories took her back in time. Mina fought with her when she took her in. She was only twelve when she ran away from home. Her aunt, by some miracle, managed to process the paperwork and for her to live in Korea. Mina didn't talk to her much, only out of respect and kindness. But she warmed up to her aunt eventually. Helping out in the house. Cooking with her. Going to the supermarket. Walking her dog. Mina was a good kid. Running away was out of her character.

But she did.

"I remember she disappeared once when I went to Japan. I filed a police report the next day when I couldn’t find her. But she came home a day after. I was furious. But I didn't want to show it. She didn't answer when I asked why she left. She only said she was at a friend's house for a project. I knew she was lying but I couldn’t bring the truth out of her. I was just glad she got back home safely. I can't imagine what her mother went through when Mina ran away from her home. After she graduated from university, she left the house. She sends money every month though I've asked her to stop. Maybe it's her way to make up for when I let her live with me. Though it's really unnecessary.

“You’re good friends with her, right? So, I guess you know she doesn’t talk much, especially about the things that bother her most. She’s a fighter, definitely. She can handle things like school, work, and pressure very well. But I’m afraid of what she can’t handle. Things like her own thoughts or traumas. She doesn’t talk about those things. I’ve tried getting her to open up about her issues with her parents or school or anything. But she’s very good at deflecting.”

There was something about Mina that her made her so easy to love but so difficult to understand. Chaeyoung saw that with the people around her. Looking at her aunt on the verge of tears, she might be so worried about Mina. She was like a daughter to her after all.

"I'll find her, ma'am," Chaeyoung said, with hope in her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I don't have anything to help you find her. But I'm sure she'll return."

Chaeyoung smiled, "I think you've helped me more than you think you did. Thank you for shedding some light."

*

Thirty-six days later and Chaeyoung received another letter in her mail. Thirty-six days later and Chaeyoung was still not over Mina and how she left her. She thought about it - moving on. But there were too many little things that reminded her of Mina in her studio. Hell, everywhere she went there was a hint of Mina. Everything she looked at. Everything she heard. She would associate the most insignificant thing to Mina. She was at a McDonald’s the other day with Nayeon and suddenly cried when the cashier gave her extra packets of ketchup. Mina loved ketchup. Nayeon had to carry their food and drag her to their seat to slap some sense into the woman (literally).

_ “That hurt you know,” Chaeyoung said, rubbing her now reddened cheek. _

_ “It was a light tap. Now, stop sulking. Do you think Mina would want you to cry at the McDonald’s counter while ordering your goddamn ice cream?” Nayeon said as she violently pointed a french fry at her. Chaeyoung shook her head. _

Chaeyoung thought about just leaving the letter as is, enclosed in the envelope, remaining to be unread. She lay down on her bed that night, after a full day of schedules, running about from the studio to the field location and back again. She barely had time for a decent meal. She hadn’t even changed out of her clothes yet, much less get to her skin care routine. Mina always made sure she did it. She just held on to the third letter (fourth if she considered the scribbled note from Day Zero), lifting it up against the light, admiring the wax work of the seal. The light passed through the envelope and she noticed something else contained in it besides a letter.

Blood rushed through her head as she sat up straight instantly, holding the envelope with both hands. She finally flipped the cover open and found the letter and a photograph.

_ Hi Chaeng, _

_ Thirty-three days. It’s been a while, huh? I hope you’re not waiting by your mailbox for these letters. You have better things to do, don’t you? _

_ I’m feeling much better. I really like it here and the people are nice. Look at the photo I took. It looks good, yeah? I learned from the best ;) _

_ I’m sorry we couldn’t go to the beach together. I know you wanted to take me to one. You wanted to see my reaction to the sand and sea breeze and the sound of waves. But I thought of you the whole time I was there. I’ve been thinking about you the whole time I’ve been here to be honest. _

_ If you’re still reading my letters, I’m getting better at managing the thoughts in my head. Sometimes, I wonder if you’ll still have me if or when I go back haha. But maybe the most I can ask is for you to not hate me? _

_ I really do hope you’re happy there. I still love you, Chaeng. _

  
  


_ Love, _

_ Mina _

Chaeyoung had cried while reading every single one of Mina’s letters and this was no exception. She wiped the tears on the sleeve of her shirt but she collected herself in record time (her sobbing sessions usually lasted maybe thirty minutes to an hour at a time even while rereading a letter) and studied the attached photograph. There might be a clue as to where Mina was.

It was a view of the ocean. There… wasn’t much else. She felt her professionalism being challenged. There were some rocks too… tiny stones. No sandy beach ( _ leave it to Mina to go to a sad rocky beach _ ). The water was clear. So it must have been… clean. There were birds in the horizon. She didn’t know much about birds so… seagulls maybe? There were some generic looking rocky formations on the far right. They were… brown and… rocky. Well, the sky was blue, there were some grey clouds and the overall feel of the photo was a tad bit gloomy because of them. There was nothing else. Nothing in the horizon that gave her much clue. Was it facing the north? South? What time of day was it? Where was the wind blowing? 

She sighed in exasperation. The bright side of it was that she knew Mina was probably living somewhere near the water, either near the coast or on an island. And the beach had no sand. And… the water was clear. And… the sky was cloudy.  _ Damn it. _

It was two in the morning and she knew Nayeon would still be up and she would march up to her apartment and bang on her door if she wouldn’t answer her damn phone. But Nayeon picked up her call.

“Chaeyoung?” she answered, clearly half asleep. Chaeyoung was amazed she woke up to her phone ringing but even more amazed that she was actually sleeping at this hour.

“I have a clue. But I need your help.”

“Damn it, Chaeyoung-ah. Go to sleep and tell me your goddamn theories tomorrow.”

*

“We don’t have to, Tzu.”

“Shut up. You’ve been hinting at it for days,” Tzuyu rolled her eyes.

It was true, though if she were to be completely honest, that was how she normally operated. While they had only limited their interactions to video calls the whole week due to their schedules, Sana was being exceptionally flirty. Wearing nothing but an oversized shirt, baring her legs in full view for Tzuyu to shy away from. She’d bite her lower lip a little too often. Sometimes, she’d angle her phone perfectly just to “unintentionally” give Tzuyu a shot of her exposed cleavage, to which the younger girl would comment, “Do you need a jacket? You keep wearing tank tops. It’s really cold out.” The next day Tzuyu sent over a double breasted light pink coat to Sana’s apartment. She loved it, of course, but that wasn’t the message she was trying to relay.

Tzuyu dragged Sana to her bedroom. It was late and they both had their days off tomorrow. The scene played out a little familiarly for Sana as the younger woman gripped her wrist tightly. Thinking about their first encounter gave Sana feelings she thought were too sinful for her own good. But there was something different about it this time. She knew it came from love and not just her need to get off (although that much was true, it didn’t mean she didn’t love Tzuyu any less).

Sana sat on the bed and crossed her legs, eagerly waiting for Tzuyu to pounce at her like before. Tzuyu closed the door and turned around to meet Sana’s eyes, staring dangerously at her. Her cheeks reddened at the contact and her eyes darted away.

There was something off. Sana could tell. And as much as she wanted Tzuyu (while she would say “needed” was the more appropriate term), she couldn’t help but notice the girl was hesitant in her approach. Tzuyu kissed her slowly pushing her back on the bed and Sana adjusted herself so she could lie down properly. Her arms on Sana’s side, her hair falling over her shoulder, Sana swore she had never seen a more beautiful sight. But she felt so tensed. Maybe Tzuyu just needed to ease into it. Sana was always an accommodating lover (or so she thought herself to be).

One by one, Tzuyu unbuttoned Sana’s top, exposing her chest, her clothed breasts, her perfectly toned stomach. The coldness of winter hit her bare skin but Tzuyu’s body against hers provided enough warmth. Sana held her face and pulled her in for a slow, languid kiss, giving Tzuyu time to explore and get comfortable. She freed her hands and tugged at the hem of Tzuyu’s shirt, pulling it over her head and arms and throwing it aside.

Tzuyu sat up, straddling Sana's hips, and ran her hand along her hair to fix it up and Sana’s mouth fell open, completely awestruck and enamored (as if she wasn’t already, this just pushed it to a whole new level). 

"Wow," was all she could say and Tzuyu laughed, slowly warming up to the situation and how dumbfounded Sana looked. She was still so shy and unsure.

"Sana?" Tzuyu said as Sana held her hands, intertwining their fingers. She could feel where this was going.

"Yes, baby?"

"I have a confession to make."

"I already know you love me," Sana joked, keeping the air light.

Tzuyu smirked, rubbing Sana's hands with her thumbs, "I haven't… I've never done this before."

Sana gulped, "Hmm?"

"I've never… _done_ _it_ before. Is that… much of a surprise?"

Sana did try to hide her surprise but she was definitely taken aback. Sure, she knew Tzuyu to be quite reserved. But she never really thought about whether or not Tzuyu had ever had sex with anyone. 

She thought carefully about what to say so as not to offend her in any way even if she had no intention to do so. And as much as she enjoyed the view of Tzuyu as she straddled her hips, gloriously half-naked, Sana coaxed Tzuyu to sit on the bed. She sat up and the younger woman sat on her heels like a little girl. She was reminded of how precious Tzuyu was and how this wasn't how she wanted her -- nervous and afraid and unsure.

"The first time is always special, Tzu, even if you spend it with someone who isn't special. Though I must confess, I am quite special," Tzuyu smacked a pillow across Sana's face. They both laughed and Sana was glad that she was at ease now, "I really meant it when I said we don't have to. I'll be here when you're ready and I'm  _ always _ ready,” Tzuyu rolled her eyes at that, “But, Tzu, whatever reservations or reasons you have for your hesitation, I’m listening, okay? I’ll take no offense in whatever you have to say or how you feel."

Tzuyu scoffed, "I hate that you’re so sweet about this when I know you're all hot and needy. It's that time of the month, right?"

Sana plopped her body on the bed in exasperation, "It’s called PMS, Tzu. Your estrogen levels go up during ovulation and  _ that  _ intensifies your libido. But I'll satiate my needs on my own." She lay down and patted the bed for Tzuyu to stay beside her, "You're the little spoon tonight." Tzuyu loved being the little spoon.

“This is not a sex ed class, Sana. I know how a woman’s body works… But thanks… and sorry. I really want to give you what you want.”

“Oh, Tzu, don’t be sorry. It’s fine,” she kissed the back of her head, smelling her banana scented hair, which by now Sana had already gotten used to. Even though Sana would do anything right about now to have her right then and there, she needed to put Tzuyu first and whatever qualms she had about sex should be addressed.

"So is this how far you'd take me?" Tzuyu said, the smirk was apparent in her voice. 

Sana smiled softly, "Baby, I'll take you as far as you'd let me." 


	3. Chapter 3

“How happy would you be if I told you I knew where this picture was taken?” Nayeon asked, the smug expression on her face was so annoying and Chaeyoung bombarded her with tiny little punches and slaps.

“Shut up!” Chaeyoung laughed, “How would you know?”   
  


Nayeon shooed Chaeyoung away, “Just be glad that I do. This is in Ulleungdo. I’m pretty sure of it.”

“How can you tell?”

Nayeon flipped the top of her laptop open and searched through her files. She was a location scout for various films, TV series and magazines (which was how the two women knew each other). The best part of her job was, of course, travelling, finding the best places to set the mood for the shot. She also did a lot of work on set, the kind of work that goes unnoticed. Putting a plant on the side of the room. Hanging a picture frame behind the main character. Arranging the furniture. Sure, it seemed boring and the audience barely noticed how good she was at her job but Nayeon loved it. 

_ “You only notice how bad the setting looks when it’s actually bad. People don’t say, ‘Wow, that scene looks perfect with that potted plant.’ but they would say, ‘That scene was shot in such a barren room.’ The best part of my job is letting people enjoy the little things even if they don’t notice it,” Nayeon explained. _

_ “That’s weirdly profound,” Chaeyoung commented. _

The picture Nayeon showed Chaeyoung looked nothing like the one Mina sent. Well, there was a view of the sea, some rocks, the gray sky. It might as well be. But how many sea-facing, rocky beaches with gray skies did Korea have? Chaeyoung was a bit skeptical about it. But she thought Nayeon was the expert.

“So… how can you tell?” Chaeyoung asked.

Nayeon rolled her eyes. She pointed at the generic rock formation in Mina’s picture and then a similar generic rock formation in her own picture. Chaeyoung squinted her eyes, tilted her head and adjusted the picture  _ and  _ the laptop screen. Scratching her head, she tried to make sense of the two images in front of her. Yeah, they definitely looked  _ similar _ . Anyone could tell they were similar. But were they  _ the same _ ?

“Something tells me you’re not convinced? Do you not trust in my powers?” Nayeon snorted.

“I do,” Chaeyoung said. She did trust her, “But Ulleungdo is kinda far and it’s pretty hard to get there I heard.”

She nodded. Nayeon had been there once and it was a wonderful island. The serene blue sea. Beautiful pebble beaches. Not to mention the delicious food. You couldn’t find seafood as fresh as the ones in Ulleungdo. But Nayeon spent about a month trying to get there. She just couldn’t time it right. The sea and skies had to be clear for her to ride the ferry. Not to mention getting to the port was a trip in itself.

“But I don’t think you can get there now. Winter seems pretty harsh this year. I don’t know if the ferry operates.”

“Nayeonnie, I’ve never heard a single negative thing come from your mouth till now,” Chaeyoung shook her head.

“I’m being realistic, but fine, let’s check the schedules,” Nayeon grabbed her laptop and began typing with much vigor. She hated being proven wrong but she hated being told she was or wasn’t a certain way even more. And Chaeyoung knew that and she just loved pushing her unnie’s buttons.

“You’d go with me, right?”

“God, no. That was a great place but I’ll be damned if I have to make multiple three-hour bus rides again just to get  _ a chance  _ to go ride the ferry,” Nayeon whined as the search results came up, “But looks like you’re in luck. The ferry is still operating and they have a schedule on Saturday,”

“I’ll pack your things,” Chaeyoung got off the couch and began raiding Nayeon’s closet.

“Yah!” Naeyon yelled out as she ran after Chaeyoung, “Don’t you dare go through my things!”

*

Dahyun made a surprise visit to the branch hospital. She had to run some errands and decided to have lunch with Tzuyu. The younger girl missed having her friends around. It was often lonely in the branch, where everyone was so much older than her since more experienced doctors were stationed there. She felt like they were sucking her life force. They were nice people.

“So, how’s it here?” Dahyun asked as she checked the insides of the sandwich she ordered.

“It’s okay, I guess. There’s a lot more work here,” Tzuyu answered, stirring her soup.

“You miss us?” Dahyun teased while she scarfed down her food, “Or just Sana?”

“Ah, I’ll be back in no time. When there’s an opening in the main hospital, I’ll be the first to apply. But I hope Mina comes back before that happens. I really like working with our team,” Tzuyu brushed off Dahyun’s attempt to embarrass her.

She thought about asking Dahyun for advice on dating Sana and just the general act of being comfortable about... things she’d rather not discuss with Dahyun. She changed her mind quickly. These matters were probably best discussed with Sana herself. But, God, was it difficult to get the words out. It felt like vomiting her guts out. And, even as a doctor, that sounded disgusting.

“So, I have this friend, right?” Tzuyu started, “She’s in this new relationship with a girl she really loves,” Dahyun hummed in response, her mouth too full to say anything, “They’ve been seeing each other for a while and she wants to take the next step.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know… the next step…”

“You have to be clearer than that, Tzu.”

“I mean… she really wants to… get to know her partner… more…”

“Marriage?”

“No, Dah--” Tzuyu reached for Dahyun’s neck in what seemed to be an attempt to strangle her in frustration, but she placed them on the table instead, “Sex. I--I mean, my friend wants to have sex with her partner.”

_ Oh, God, the words came out. I feel so tainted. _

“Oh, well, there’s really nothing wrong with that. Momo and I--”

“Okay, well, the thing is… She’s never done it before… So, she’s a little hesitant.”

Dahyun nodded as she finished her sandwich and Tzuyu could not believe she was talking about this while they were having lunch and that Dahyun was just enjoying her meal like this was a normal conversation, “Well, the first time is always scary. Like you don’t know if she’s ‘the one’, if she’ll be there when you wake up the next morning, or if she has STDs --”

“I know, I’ve been telling her about STDs.”

‘Yeah, and I mean, you’re laying yourself bare for the other person. But here’s what I think. If you really love your partner, you have to be vulnerable. You have to let your guard down, show her all your demons and let her in.”

“Are we still talking about sex?”

“There are no demons in sex. I mean… if you’re into that then--”

“I will stop talking to you now.”

Dahyun laughed loudly, smacking the table top repeatedly and urging Tzuyu to sit back down, “Okay, okay. Tell your friend that sex is more than just a physical thing, especially with a partner you love. Sex is…” Dahyun raised her hands up, as if trying to call the angels above, “a spiritual experience, more than it is a physical one.”

“What if she’s not good at it?” Tzuyu asked curiously, “Her partner is kind of experienced in that field and she’s, well, a newbie.”

“I’m sure her girlfriend will understand. I think she might actually find it really cute that she’s so new to it,” Dahyun giggled, probably reliving her own memories of her first time. Tzuyu shrugged.

“Okay, duly noted. I’ll be sure to tell my friend,” Tzuyu nodded as she picked up her tray and Dahyun stood up and brushed the crumbs off her skirt.

“Sana is very understanding,” Dahyun smirked.

“I was talking about my friend!” Tzuyu snapped but she couldn’t avoid the blush on her cheeks. Dahyun just laughed it off, knowing full well that Tzuyu had slipped.

*

Coffee fueled her. It was probably running in her veins at this point. Chaeyoung stayed up all night, doing research on Ulleungdo. If Nayeon was wrong about Mina’s possible whereabouts, she would definitely  _ not  _ kill her, maybe she would just punch her in the face. She was staying at the coffee shop she and Nayeon frequented, except she was alone. She was thinking about the letters, perhaps there were some clues to point her to where she might be in Ulleungdo

_ “I’ll let them burn before you get the chance to read them haha.” _

Mina must be residing somewhere that would let you burn things. A fire hazard though.

_ “I really like it here.” _

It must be somewhere quiet, away from the rest of the world, even if it is on an island. Chaeyoung imagined Mina must be living in a house away from the main roads. She hoped she was safe. Mina liked to keep to herself. Maybe a little too much. Even when she was with Chaeyoung, she was off in her own world, thinking deeply about whatever. Maybe Chaeyoung should have asked her more, get Mina to let her into her thoughts.

_ “and the people are nice.” _

They were either not talking to her or they minded their own business. Mina’s favorite type of people.

The heaviness in her heart was hard to carry. She kept thinking about how she could have been better for Mina. But this wasn’t about her. This was about Mina, so she shrugged it off and got back to her investigating.

She took note of the days between the time Mina wrote the letters and when she received them. It always took three to five days. It was rather fast, so she probably lived near the post office. Or she had to bribe the postman maybe.

Mina would probably find a job to do there. She did take her medical books. Perhaps she became a teacher… an unlicensed teacher who could be barred. No, Mina wouldn’t do that. She would probably still be a doctor in a local clinic or hospital. Maybe she took some odd jobs, the kind that didn’t need that much mental work as being a doctor did. Though she couldn’t imagine Mina being a kitchen staff cleaning dishes till ten in the evening, or waking up at four in the morning to shop for vegetables for the cook. Maybe a waitress. A really cute waitress. What if Mina started fishing? It was an island after all. People who lived in islands fished, right? Chaeyoung thought if people who lived on islands heard her thoughts she’d get beaten up for generalizing. She apologized internally. 

Whatever the hell Mina was doing, Chaeyoung hoped she was healing. Judging from her letters, she did say she was doing better.

She jotted down on her notebook the possible places she could find Mina when she and Nayeon (yes, she finally convinced the older woman) go to Ulleungdo. (1) Places near the post office. (2) Houses rented out in a far off location away from the town proper and major roads. (3) The local hospital or clinic.

Chaeyoung capped her pen and kept her faith. Her plan would be set in motion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for your patronage lol. Please do let me know what you think of the story so far! Which part of the story do you like more, if any (lol)? Are you a SaTzu enthusiast or a MiChaeng stan? Haha! Do you like the angst/sad turn of events and all? Or do you prefer the funnier/lighter side? Do you like this kind of story telling? Two sides of a big plot? Let me know! I'd love to hear your thoughts! Hmu on twitter @trash_for_twice haha! If you can, and you don't have to, but i'd appreciate a contribution on ko-fi (please check the link in my twitter profile). komawo!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! This is kind of a short chapter compared to the rest haha. But I hope you enjoy this one! It's a bit lighthearted with some SaTzu fluff and some overconfident Nayeon haha!

Sana had her own plans as well.

What would a romantic weekend look like? She never had these thoughts before. It never came to mind when she dated all the boys and girls in her roster. But here she was going on a three-hour bus ride with Tzuyu to Yongpyong Ski Resort. She had planned out their romantic weekend getaway the past week (she was no longer feeling hot and needy since her period had passed, no more heightened estrogen levels for Sana) and she was feeling rather romantic and hopelessly in love with her girlfriend.

Neither of them had gone skiing before so it was a new experience for both. They checked in their bags and went ahead to start the day’s activities. 

Sana held Tzuyu’s hand as they rode the chairlift up the slope. Neither was afraid of heights, Sana just wanted to let her girlfriend know she was with her. Tzuyu looked at her quizzically. 

“What?” Tzuyu raised her eyebrow.

“Nothing. Just thought about how much I love you,” Sana said as she rubbed her nose on Tzuyu’s, the classic eskimo kiss.

“Ew,” Tzuyu smiled, “I love you too.”

Readying their gear and equipment, the instructor gave them some tips and practice runs before proceeding with the actual act of skiing. Sana was an uncoordinated klutz and it amazed ever herself that her hands remained steady during an open heart surgery (except for that one time). But as clumsy as she was, she was rather brave and adventurous, letting go of the instructor's guiding hands, causing him to let out a high-pitched squeal when Sana flopped on the snow one too many times. Tzuyu got near to help her up. Sana was pretty sure the nerves on her bottom had become numb from the snow. She pulled Tzuyu down with her so now they were both lying in the snow, laughing their frozen butts off. Sana loved how the snow made everything brighter, even made Tzuyu glow more. She didn’t think it was possible but looking at how Tzuyu’s nose turned pink in the cold and the way her eyes smiled with her beautiful lashes framing them was enough to keep Sana warm.

When the instructor was confident enough with their skills, he let them go down the slope on their own. Well, he seemed to trust Tzuyu anyway. They went down slowly and at an even pace, smiling at each other when their eyes met. 

"Race you down?" Sana challenged, a glint in her eye.

Tzuyu laughed, "Really, Sana? You fell like seven times in practice."

"Six and a half!” Sana corrected, “Let's have a bet then. If I win," she hummed, thinking about what to reward herself in that event, "I can be the little spoon."

Tzuyu gasped in fake shock, "How dare you? I'm the little spoon in this relationship!"

Sana stuck her tongue out and left Tzuyu in the dust (or snow). She darted downward, letting gravity and momentum and all the physics do the work for her. Tzuyu followed and used her ski poles to speed her way down. She whizzed past Sana fluidly after a few meters from their starting point and looked back, giving Sana a wink and a two finger salute as she continued her path to victory. It didn't take long for Tzuyu to reach the bottom and Sana followed, thankfully not crashing into anything.

"Guess I win!" Tzuyu declared as Sana panted, the puffs of air turning to smoke. She hugged Sana, their cheeks touching and though their skin was cold, her heart warmed at the contact. Sana smiled softly, rubbing her cheek against Tzuyu’s in a playful manner.

"I like being the big spoon anyway," Sana chuckled as she patted Tzuyu's butt lightly.

*

The three-hour bus ride to the port was long and cold and Nayeon still couldn't believe she got dragged into this mess.

Chaeyoung bribed her with Dr. Yoo's personal phone number, which she got from Mina's laptop. Yes, she was violating doctor-patient confidentiality and their professional relationship, bla bla. But at this point, Chaeyoung was desperate and needed her friend with her in this tireless journey to look for Mina. 

Nayeon met Dr. Yoo at the bar but failed to get her number. Nayeon.  _ The _ Im Nayeon. Failed to get a woman's phone number. Preposterous.

"Are we there yet?" Nayeon whined.

"It's only been an hour," Chaeyoung said, "Here, sleep on my shoulder."

Two hours later and Chaeyoung was leaning against Nayeon. They both fell asleep. The older woman was in an awkward position since she didn't have a shoulder to lean on, Chaeyoung being shorter than her.

She had a vivid dream about Mina. The sea breeze blowing strongly on what she imagined a cliff in Ulleungdo looked like. Chaeyoung stood a few meters behind Mina who was sitting on the edge, her legs swinging above the water, the waves crashing on the rocks strongly. Mina looked over her shoulder and met Chaeyoung’s eyes. She started crying, the tears were pouring and she walked closer to Mina. The distance wouldn’t seem to close. She just kept walking and walking, unable to reach Mina. The ground beneath them started shaking, cracking and breaking. Chaeyoung ran as fast as she could in this endless path to Mina, her legs in burning pain. The edge of the cliff collapsed. The dust and ominous smoke blocked her vision and in the blink of an eye Mina disappeared along with the rubble. She didn’t make it to Mina in time.

The bus tires screeched and they came to an abrupt halt, causing the two women to wake up, groggy and confused, nearly hitting the seats in front of them. Chaeyoung’s forehead and neck were covered in cold sweat. They got off and groaned, stretched and shook off the drowsiness. By some miracle the weather was perfect for seafaring. Nayeon concluded that perhaps it was Chaeyoung's lucky day and that it would be a very lucky trip for her.

Mina never gave much thought to dreams, being a woman of science. Dreams didn’t really have “meanings”. Chaeyoung knew that about her. She never thought much of it either but the dream bothered her. It wasn’t the first dream she’d had about Mina. But this was the most haunting one. She needed a distraction. But sadly, it was just a ferry ride, the sea and Nayeon. Though Nayeon would do a pretty good job of keeping her occupied.

And then began another three hours of waiting to get to their destination. Chaeyoung took the time to annoy Nayeon.

“So what’s the deal with you and Sana anyway?” Chaeyoung asked out of curiosity. Because the last time she saw them together, one was grinding on the other’s ass on the dance floor at the club. But now one of them was in a happy relationship and the other is being dragged across the sea to look for Mina with her.

“We’re just friends,” Nayeon said offhandedly.

“Nothing ever came between you two? I mean, you two were like… banging each other?”

“Nah,” she shook her head, “We just met at the right place and at the right time. She was going through a breakup and I was in need of some release after a hectic week. It happened once but we kept bumping into each other. Literally.” Chaeyoung made a disgusted face, “It didn’t help that we went to the same clubs and bars. But, God, we were, in our own respective ways, really messed up people. We didn’t want to have anything to do with each other, outside of doing each other.”

Chaeyoung shrugged, “Okay, okay. Stop. I get it.”

“No! You asked for this!” Nayeon laughed, “We fucked around a lot! A LOT!”

“YAAAAH!” Chaeyoung said as she covered her ears from the sin coming from Nayeon’s mouth, as if she was so saintly herself. She decided to switch topics and asked more about how she failed to get Dr. Yoo's number, “Okay, okay, enough about Sana. What about Dr. Yoo?”

"We were dancing together. She seemed pretty into it and into  _ me _ ," Nayeon explained seriously.

"You think everyone's into you," Chaeyoung scoffed, receiving a bonk on the head.

"I followed her to the bar and we had a really nice conversation. And her name is Jeongyeon. She was totally flirting with me, laughing at my jokes, touching my arm every now and then."

"Maybe she was being friendly?"

"No way. By the end of the night, she had her tongue down my throat," Nayeon argued.

"That's not very friendly," Chaeyoung remarked, looking disgusted at the thought of the two older women getting it on.

"It's too friendly if you ask me," Nayeon continued, "She told me she was going to the bathroom before we would leave and she never came back. I checked the bathroom after like twenty minutes and she wasn't there."

Chaeyoung shrugged, "She climbed out the bathroom window?"

"I don't know, but no one leaves Im Nayeon in the cold," she declared and Chaeyoung rolled her eyes.

The rest of the ferry ride became a long analysis of how and why Jeongyeon left  _ the  _ Im Nayeon. Perhaps she was drunk and needed to get home before things got too far. Perhaps she simply wasn’t interested in  _ the  _ Im Nayeon and was just being nice by being “flirty” and sticking her tongue down  _ the  _ Im Nayeon’s throat. Perhaps she was that kind of woman, the kiss-and-run kind, though Nayeon would not mind the fuck-and-run type if they looked like Dr. Yoo Jeongyeon. Chaeyoung shrugged again for the nth time.

The sight of the island became clearer amidst the foggy waters. It looked beautiful, serene. Chaeyoung thought it was the perfect place to heal oneself, away from the city and the people and all the pressures.

The ferry docked on shore and Nayeon got off as quickly as possible and knelt on the ground, leaving Chaeyoung to pick up their bags. Nayeon exclaimed, "Oh, thank God we're on solid ground."

Chaeyoung grabbed her arm and made her get up, "Don't embarrass us."

They rented a car and Nayeon was just amazed at how Chaeyoung coordinated this whole trip with no help from her at all. She was becoming quite the responsible adult.

"So what's the plan? Just gonna go door to door and show a picture of Mina and ask if they've seen her?"

"That's Plan Z," Chaeyoung laughed as she started the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I appreciate the comments and kudos and everything! Hmu on twitter if you want to slap me across my virtual face or anything if I made you sad hahaha! I'd also appreciate any amount of contribution to my ko-fi account uwu (please check the link on my twitter profile). Thank you all!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Just a bit of a heads up:  
1\. This chapter is entirely SaTzu so you can skip it if you want  
2\. This chapter is entirely smutty so you can skip it if you want
> 
> Hope you enjoy reading this stuff! Haha!

Night began to fall on the snowy hilltop in Yongpyong Ski Resort. Sana and Tzuyu waited for their meal to be served, anticipating the hot bowl of ginseng chicken soup that could hopefully restore their energies from the day's exhausting activities. They still had some planned activities tomorrow - the sheep farm! Tzuyu was so excited and Sana was just as happy seeing her girlfriend cheer up at the thought of seeing farm animals.

Tzuyu was trying to teach Sana the Chinese word for sheep, which was exactly the same as the Korean word but with a slight intonation that Sana just couldn’t get. Tzuyu asked Sana to repeat after her while swishing her finger in the air, trying to physically manifest the tone of the word. Sana just giggled at how adorable she was. As much as Sana tried to pinpoint the exact moment she fell in love with Tzuyu, she couldn't. She seemed to fall in love with her every day. Sana smiled knowing that she no longer had to hold back her love for the younger woman.

Their order arrived and they ate their dinner, talking about how tired they were and how sore they would probably be the next day. The sauna sounded good tonight.

*

“Is the heat okay with you?” Sana asked as Tzuyu entered the sauna room, her hair pulled up in a high ponytail. Sana nodded to herself as she noted how well the hairstyle suited Tzuyu and how she should tie her hair up more often, letting the loose baby hair (her sorry excuse for bangs) fall on her forehead. Her eyes lingered on Tzuyu’s body, covered in nothing but that towel. She clung on to it for dear life and Sana thought it was cute how she was still so shy after all this time. Trying to distract herself from staring at Tzuyu, Sana added more water into the rock basket, creating more steam.

They sat across from each other, not making eye contact or talking. It was a comfortable silence, except that Sana found herself just a bit hot and perhaps a bit needy. Maybe the steam wasn’t helping with her own heat because stealing glances at her nearly unclothed girlfriend was perhaps a bit too much. Tzuyu rested against the bench and knocked her head back. She ran her hand along the back of her neck, massaging it lightly and breathing heavily. Sana stared at her, thirsting for her --

_ No, stop for your sinful thoughts, Sana! I’ll wait for Tzuyu when she’s ready, even if it takes her days… weeks… months…  _

There wasn’t anything to distract her in the sauna except for some instructions and reminders posted on the wall and she had read that  _ at least  _ eight times.

“Hey,” Tzuyu asked, her voice low and the breath of air tickled Sana’s ear. She didn’t realize the younger woman moved next to her, “You seem a little tense.” Tzuyu nudged Sana so that her back was facing her. She began massaging her shoulders, her neck, her back. Sana did  _ not  _ feel relaxed at all, not when the tension was boiling inside her. Trying her best not to moan, all Sana could do was release puffs of air as Tzuyu added pressure to her muscles and joints. Her hands reached Sana’s chest, just barely hovering above her breasts, not even touching the towel that covered them.

If Tzuyu was teasing her, she was damn good at it. Sana felt how wet she was underneath. It was definitely  _ not  _ the sweat caused by the sauna. Her arousal was pooling. Good God was she feeling hot.

She read the reminders again. No rowdy behavior.  _ Fuck. _

The ding of a bell resounded, which meant it was about time for them to leave and Sana shot up and held on to her towel, “Well, looks like we’re done. Shall we?” She asked as she approached the door, holding on the knob. She looked back to meet Tzuyu’s eyes, dilated and ravenous.

*

Sana had cooled down for the most part. After a cold shower and lying still on the bed, intertwining her fingers, setting them above her tummy, she was still thinking about Tzuyu’s touch and, fuck, her intense glare. Tzuyu came out of the shower, drying her hair. She smiled sweetly at her but Sana was immensely frustrated right now and barely responded.

The look on Tzuyu’s face was… satisfaction, smug even, as if she had won a trivial contest. Tzuyu lay next to her, propping her left elbow on the bed and her head resting against her hand. She trailed her fingertips on Sana’s arm, sending tingling sensations to her nerves. It wasn’t like Sana’s heat had dissipated much since their time at the sauna but it was building up quickly again. Tzuyu slid her right hand under Sana’s oversized shirt, the kind she usually wore to sleep (and nothing much else though tonight she put on a pair of sweatpants because she couldn’t go pants-less in this cold), feeling the warmth and the hardness of her tensed abs. Sana closed her eyes, sighing as Tzuyu slowly moved up. She caught her breath when Tzuyu finally cupped her breast, kneading it ever so lightly. Sana turned her head to face Tzuyu but still kept her eyes closed, smiling, urging her to keep going.

She felt Tzuyu's hot breathe against her lips, coming in closer for a slow kiss. Parting her lips for the younger woman to taste her, feeling her tongue against her own. Fuck, Sana didn’t know when Tzuyu got so good at kissing. Not that she was bad at it before, but she seemed to have learned some new techniques. Sana bit Tzuyu's lip in retaliation as the younger woman pinched her nipple. She giggled and apologized before holding Tzuyu's face in her hands, pulling her closer.

The cool air replaced Tzuyu's lips as she moved to straddle Sana's hips, she lifted her shirt over her head, revealing a lacy black lingerie set. The thought that she was preparing for tonight warmed Sana’s heart (as much as it did other parts of her body). She thought of how she’d like to rip them off but knowing Tzuyu, she’d probably just remove them slowly because who knew how much they cost?

Sana reached out to caress Tzuyu’s hips moving her hands up her sides, feeling every single inch of her skin, feeling every electrifying nerve in each touch. She reached her clothed breasts and looked at Tzuyu. She smiled reassuringly in reply to her unspoken question and Sana unhooked the bra, throwing it gently to the side. And that was it. Sana finally saw Tzuyu in all her half naked glory, her bare breasts, her toned abs and her glowing tanned skin. Taking in all the beauty Tzuyu had to offer, she attempted to memorize every inch of her body, tattooing the image in her mind.

"My eyes are up here, soldier," Tzuyu mocked as she shifted her weight forward and kissed Sana. She dug her fingers into Tzuyu's hair, pulling her closer, not wanting any space between them. Realizing that her shirt had become a hindrance from feeling Tzuyu’s skin against her own, Sana broke away from their kiss to remove her shirt. God, the skin contact made her melt. Her nipples brushing along her breasts, Sana would have come from just that but she kept it in. 

Just then, Sana had a moment of clarity. She realized Tzuyu had lost all of her previous inhibitions.

“Baby,” Sana gasped for air when Tzuyu finally released her from their kiss, trailing her lips along her jaw and then her neck, “you sure?”

Tzuyu said nothing but her hands tugging at Sana’s pants were a clear enough response. She lifted her hips so her pants could slide off and Tzuyu began her descent, taking a painstakingly long time to get there, trailing kisses along Sana’s milky white skin.

“Hey, wait,” Sana propped up on her elbows, a little bit shaky, a little bit breathless. Tzuyu stopped and lifted herself up just before she reached where Sana needed her most, “This is your first time. Would you rather I--”

“Unnie,” Sana wished she’d stop calling her that because it turned her on as much as she hated to admit it. Tzuyu smiled, the expression on her face was a mixture of both shyness and excitement, “You’ve been so good to me,” Tzuyu kissed her gently, “This is my gift to you.”

“Okay, but--” Tzuyu shut her up with her lips. The kiss deepened immediately. Sana couldn't complain, not that she wanted to. Tzuyu touched Sana’s dripping, wet folds lightly with her index finger, just around the entrance, teasing her just enough. The touch sent shivers down Sana’s spine causing her to moan into their kiss. Sana gasped as Tzuyu slipped one digit in, not wasting any time to please her girlfriend. Her slick fluids coating her fingers. Fuck, Sana trembled at her touch. Here she thought she would get Tzuyu off with a single touch but she felt herself on the edge of climax much too soon. It was a little embarrassing to be honest.

“You’re so wet, unnie,” Tzuyu whispered in between their heated kiss, her voice was low and it was unusual for her but Sana loved it. Her lips were getting numb and sore and she couldn't concentrate on kissing Tzuyu because Sana wanted her so badly, she wanted her fingers inside her, she wanted to let her know she was all hers and no one else’s, “I’m sorry I’ve kept you waiting when you’re so needy.” Sana dragged her nails on Tzuyu’s back, trying to hold back her orgasm for as long as she could. She only dreamed of this before. Now it was a reality and it was so much better than any fantasy she concocted in her mind. “Oh, unnie, you feel so good," Tzuyu breathed against Sana’s ear as she added another finger inside. Sana had to bite down Tzuyu’s shoulder. She’d have to apologize for that later since she couldn’t form coherent sentences anymore.

She may have started slow when she thrusted her fingers into Sana’s dripping core but her speed soon became increasingly intense. Sana began moving her hips, yearning for more friction. It was surprising that they found such a coordinated rhythm so quickly. 

“Fuck! Tzuyu, don’t stop!”

Tzuyu held Sana with her other hand, keeping their bodies close. Sana panted, her chest rising and falling. Tzuyu began to tease her clit, rubbing circles on it. And, shit, Sana was seeing stars by now as Tzuyu added more pressure and speed to the throbbing bud.

She was close, so close. She cupped Tzuyu’s cheek with one hand while the other gripped her shoulders tightly. Sana looked her in the eyes, they were intense, unwavering and, oh, so hot. She wanted Tzuyu to see her come undone but eye contact had become so hard to keep at this point.

“Tzuyu, I’m going to come!”

The sound of her slick coated fingers slapping Sana’s folds, knuckle deep made her yell out profanities in all the languages she knew. Sana cried out Tzuyu’s name when she curled her fingers upward, triggering a sensation she had probably felt before but it never felt as heavenly as it did now. Sana buried her face in the crook of Tzuyu’s neck before she came, screaming her name, hips bucking, legs shaking. Tzuyu kept thrusting, slowing her speed as Sana came down from her high, panting, trying to get oxygen to her probably fried brain.

Sana surrendered herself to gravity and just flopped on the bed, letting go of her hold on Tzuyu’s shoulders, her skin had probably bruised from the tight grip. She removed her fingers and did something Sana never imagined Tzuyu doing -- she sucked her fingers, licking the remaining juices off of them -- and kissed her afterwards, letting Sana taste herself. It was insane how that managed to turn her on and she felt the heat rising once more.

Tzuyu smiled at her dumbstruck girlfriend. She looked so happy to get Sana off, writhing in pleasure and screaming her name, among other things. It was such a beautiful sight. Tzuyu sat up, legs apart, straddling Sana’s hips, and held her right shoulder with her left hand while stretching her arm, “No one ever said sex was such a work out.”

“I’m starting to doubt if you really are a virgin,” Sana laughed, still trying to catch her breath.

“I spent an uncomfortable amount of time watching porn,” Tzuyu rolled her eyes though Sana believed it to be true, “for research, of course.” 

_ Of course. _

The little giggle escaped Sana, “You’ve been sitting on my stomach for quite some time now.” Not realizing how wet she was herself, Tzuyu blushed and attempted to get off her. 

“Wait, stay there,” Sana held Tzuyu’s hips, “I’m loving the view,” Tzuyu was soaked through her underwear, her juices just dripping on Sana’s stomach and she reveled at the sight of it, at the sight of her girlfriend finally being comfortable enough with her. She felt trusted. And that was more pleasurable than any physical act could bring about.

"So, are we just going to stare at each or are you going to make me come?" Tzuyu smirked.

Sana tugged at her arm and pulled her in for a kiss, wrapping her arms around Tzuyu before turning the tables with the younger woman now under her. She could never tire of Tzuyu's beauty with her hair a perfect mess, her cute pink lips and her flushed cheeks giving her face a tint of redness and her smile, God, her smile lit up Sana's world.

"Baby, you're going to wish you let me inside you sooner."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for making it this far! Unfortunately, the story is almost coming to an end. It has been a fun ride, really. I've been working on other stuff as well but I don't know if I'll post any of it lol. I appreciate the comments and kudos so far! It really means a lot! You can follow me on twitter for updates or if you want to bug me about the story or anything lol. Thank you all!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! It's been a while! Work has been quite overwhelming. But I'm back! Please enjoy this chapter! Thank you so much for the comments and kudos!
> 
> I was inspired by this song actually, She's In The Rain by The Rose. Give it a listen! Especially when you get to the second half of this chapter! Was the song the whole reason I wrote this fic? Perhaps lol

Striking out the checklist, Chaeyoung scratched her head in frustration. Mina wasn't working in the hospital or clinics. No one saw her by the post office. They went around the town proper asking the locals but to no avail. Slowly losing hope, Chaeyoung wondered if they went to the wrong place but Nayeon swore she was right, though the doubt in her voice seemed a bit more apparent this time.

They decided to have dinner in a little restaurant Nayeon recommended. She ordered a full platter of various seafood bubbling in a big metal hot pot. But it didn't seem to cheer Chaeyoung up. How could she? She thought she was so close to finding Mina. That she was on the right track. That maybe today would be the day. She wanted it to be the day.

"What would you say to her when you find her?" Nayeon asked, keeping her eye on the squid simmering in the soup.

Honestly, Chaeyoung never thought about it. She didn't have a printed out speech in hand or an outline of major points to say. It wasn’t like she had been rehearsing the words in front of a mirror. She didn't think about how she would probably get so angry at Mina and cry her eyes out and hold Mina because she missed the scent of her lilac perfume or whatever the hell she was wearing this time. She didn't want to yell at Mina and tell her that she would have held her hand all the way as she recovered and that she would have supported her in any way possible. She didn't think about it until now. She had been so obsessed with finding her, she didn't know how to react if they  _ did _ find her.

"I don't know. Cry and beg her to come back?" Chaeyoung joked without meeting Nayeon's eyes.

It was always difficult to look at Chaeyoung sad. She had a bright energy and enthusiasm in living life and seeing that drained out of her was taxing on Nayeon. How much heavier would it be for Chaeyoung herself? Nayeon recalled, "I can only remember one time you were this sad -- when your grandma was admitted to the hospital. When we met on one of the days you visited her, you said a code blue alarm went off but you were weirdly happy. And I thought, 'the fuck is wrong with this woman? She had been so sad in the past few days and today was the worst. Why is she so happy?' Turned out you met Mina."

Chaeyoung chuckled, "I knew of her. I mean I had to do an article about her. I looked her up and couldn't find a picture. Her SNS profile had a picture of a dog. I guess I didn't expect her to be so… alluring."

"Ew. Stop it. You're being all mushy," Nayeon rolled her eyes, but she seemed to like hearing the story.

"Shut up. I know love my Mina x Chaeyoung stories," Chaeyoung argued as they started eating the wide array of seafood in front of them from fish to oysters to octopi. It was an amazing feast. Nayeon chowed down as Chaeyoung continued, "I kept thinking why she left. Things finally settled in and I thought we were happy. I guess she wasn't, huh? I wondered if I was enough--"

"Bitch, don't say that!" Nayeon exclaimed as she pointed a piece of crab meat at her, "You are Son Chaeyoung, master photographer, painter and most likely Mina's best lover. You have been and will always be enough for Mina and for yourself!"

"Calm down, Nayeon! This is a quiet town and people are staring."

"My point is that I don't think you were lacking. And before you go defending Mina, I don't think she lacked in being your girlfriend either. I mean… Not after the incident. But she's got something in the head, yeah? Not saying she's crazy. We've all little loose screws here and there. But she's got demons she has to fight and maybe this is her way of dealing."

Chaeyoung was quiet. She didn't really think of it that way. Surely the idea passed her mind but the loudest voices were always the ones telling her that she wasn't enough for Mina. She was glad Nayeon put her mind into perspective.

*

"So we're really going door to door?" Nayeon asked, stretching and doing some morning calisthenics before they headed out.

Chaeyoung thought it was too desperate. That she had already reached Plan Z. But there was nothing else. They had already spent two days searching for Mina on the island already. It was nice and all. But the silence at night was deafening and she much preferred the city. 

"Let's go to that spot, the one in the picture," Chaeyoung said, looking forward, holding the picture.

"What if Mina found out that we're here and left," Nayeon posited.

That was a possibility. But Chaeyoung didn't care.

*

Standing on the pebble beach, letting the ice cold water wash her feet, Chaeyoung thought about how Mina probably enjoyed this. It was quiet. Just the sound of the waves crashing the shore and the occasional vehicle passing by the main road. She wiggled her toes in the water. She and Nayeon held on to their shoes and looked at the rock formations that made their way to both Mina and Nayeon's photos.

The freezing sea breeze brushed her cheeks and it stung a bit but the scent was so relaxing. Nayeon sighed, "Chaeyoung-ah, I'm going to dry my feet and wait in the car. Remember this is our last day here. We have to go back first thing tomorrow morning. So… just enjoy yourself," she winced at the tiny pressures pinching her feet as she walked back to the car.

She didn't know how long she'd been standing there. She didn't know if Nayeon was still waiting for her in the car. Maybe she fell asleep. She'd probably be honking at the horn, rushing Chaeyoung. But she wasn't and maybe she was respecting her time to reflect.

The water was clear. She could see all the way through. Her feet. The pebbles. The little fish that swam around her feet. Her own reflection was painted on the surface. Her black roots had grown out and she decided to dye her hair black instead a few weeks ago so it didn’t look all mismatched. She much preferred black hair for herself. So who was the woman with blonde hair standing behind her?

_ For fuck's sake! _

Chaeyoung cussed under her breath as the woman caught her by surprise.

Mina.

Mina was standing behind her. Blonde hair and everything. She smiled so sweetly in her white dress, holding her black winter coat. Chaeyoung wondered if a huge wave had consumed her while she was staring into nothing, and she died and went straight to heaven.

"You'll get sick staying there that long," Mina said and held out her hand. God, her voice. Chaeyoung missed the sound of her voice. All she could do was play back videos of Mina just to hear her voice.

Chaeyoung stared at Mina. Her breathing was shallow and her jaw clenched. Oh, how she wanted to yell at her, to get mad and tell her off for leaving her without notice, no word, no clue, no indication as to why and how and where. But she stood there frozen, paralyzed by the sight of this woman, her greatest love. 

"Mina…" was all Chaeyoung could say before the tears streamed down her face, just as the first time she met her. 

She looked sad and guilty as if she had committed the most heinous of crimes, full of resentment from her acts. But here she was offering a hand for the victim she hurt. Her eyes carried a burden and the tears trickled down her chin and they dropped into the water, mingling with the sea.

Mina retreated her hand but Chaeyoung stopped her, gripping it tight. They were freezing but their hands formed the slightest amount of heat. Chaeyoung began sobbing and she lowered her head, the tears couldn't stop falling now. She wanted to say so much but the words wouldn't come out.

"I'm sorry, Chaeng." Mina said. She lifted Chaeyoung's chin up so she could face her, "I love you so much and I couldn't be the woman you deserve."

"Stop saying that," Chaeyoung said in between her sobs, finding her voice, "You think leaving solved that? You think writing me letters solved that? You wanted me to move on but how could I? Your letters kept me hanging on to you. As much as I wanted to, Mina, I didn’t let you go. I couldn’t. I still can’t.

“It hurt so much more to let you go without so much as an explanation or closure than to keep holding on to the thought that you’d return. Hell, Mina, if you left me even with an explanation, I wouldn't know what to do with myself. I can't move on. Not when I know you're hurt and I can't help."

Chaeyoung moved to drier ground, while uncoolly wincing at the pain the pebbles caused on her feet. She turned around and yelled, her voice unusually shrill and cracked at all the wrong times, "Fuck you, Mina! I was so confused and I don't know why you left! And I kept thinking if I wasn't enough and I kept thinking about how I could have been better for you! I can't believe I still want you after all this time, after tracing your every goddamn step and dragging Nayeon into this fucking mess!"

Mina moved closer and Chaeyoung just continued, "You're so important to me, Mina. You became my whole world and my life. It hurt that you didn't let me take care of you… you didn't give me the chance." She wiped her tears with her shirtsleeve, "Didn't you ever think that holding on and fighting your own darkness is a lot harder when you do it alone, Mina? Because I will hold you until you feel better… Mina, I’ll stay with you. I’ll keep you steady. I’ll go through everything with you… 

"I'm rambling I know," Chaeyoung concluded.

Mina hugged her and Chaeyoung missed it so much. Mina's touch, her warm cheeks, her lilac scent, the way her own body just fit perfectly in her arms. Chaeyoung continued to cry, burying her face in Mina's neck.

They stayed like that for what seemed like an indefinite period of time. Mina let go of her embrace and held Chaeyoung’s face, wiping away the tears from eyes.

"The voices and images in my head… they were too loud. And I kept thinking back to that night I almost died. I can't forget the man's face, his expression, the life he had and how it was taken away in an instant. And it’s not just him, Chaeng. It’s every one of my patients…” Mina’s voice hitched. She looked away, “I couldn’t help them… and I couldn’t come to terms with that… There were too many things that triggered these thoughts.

“I thought that leaving would hurt you so much, but I wanted to escape these thoughts, to escape myself. I needed to realign my mind. Do you think it was easy for me to leave? I'm a real mess, Chaeng. It's so hard to accept help and love from other people, especially you. I don't want to burden you and I don't want you to see me like this… like I'm so broken...

"But I will, Chaeng, I’ll get better,” her voice was desperate. Chaeyoung could feel the truth in them. The hurt. The hope. The will. But there was something else in there, the way her voice shook. She was afraid. The fear that she wouldn’t get better was lurking. Mina was well aware of it, “I've enjoyed being alone all my life, Chaeng, and I’ve always solved my problems on my own. I'm sorry I didn't let you help, but that’s just not how I do things. Please give me time… to fix myself.”

Chaeyoung grabbed Mina's shoulders, "But I'm here, Mina! I always have been! You're not alone anymore… I'll never let you fight alone. Why can’t you understand that?" She knew better than to force herself into Mina’s life and in the inner workings of her mind, but she didn’t know how else she could help.

She was crying incessantly, holding onto Mina and wrapping her arms around her neck, her hands clutching on her shoulders with an iron grip, afraid the love she thought she’d lost would escape her again. Because she couldn't believe she found Mina in this chaos, she couldn't believe after all this time she was still foolishly and undeniably in love with Mina. She looked up at her and rested her forehead against Mina's, their breaths becoming one. Chaeyoung held Mina's cheeks and kissed her. The familiar taste flushed Chaeyoung's senses and all she could remember was how good it felt to be with Mina and how happy she was.

Chaeyoung pulled away slowly, lingering, still trying to process everything. She looked at Mina's eyes, full of pain and regret, "I'm always here for you, Mina. Let me love you. Let me help you fix yourself."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've re-read and re-written this chapter quite a number of times. I hope this satisfies everyone lol I'm certainly happy with it. Thank you for the support so far! As you can tell by now, the series is coming to an end T.T But I'm working on other stuff as well so keep posted! Follow me on twitter for updates and some random rambles @trash_for_twice. Would also greatly appreciate any support through ko-fi (please check the link on my twitter profile).


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Two updates in one day? Haha!
> 
> Sadly, this is the last chapter T.T It has been a fun ride and writing has really helped me in dealing with my own inner demons. I'm going though a bunch of stuff so this has been quite healing. Now that I'm done I'm not quite sure what else to do. Haha! I'm working on other stuff but they aren't as fun as this one. We'll see haha!
> 
> Thank you so much for the support! It is highly appreciated!

The bell that hung above the door resounded as Tzuyu entered the flower shop. She bought a bouquet of tulips and daisies, setting them in the basket behind her bike. It was a sunny spring day and the weather was just perfect for biking.

She finally got assigned back to the main hospital where she spent most of her days (and nights) with Sana without wasting all of her time and energy commuting. While Seoul did boast one of the best public transportation systems in the world, public transport was still… public transport. The longer the worse. 

The best part about being back though was that Mina had returned. Everyone was overjoyed with the news and they decided to prepare a little get together for her. Dahyun asked Tzuyu to buy flowers. The daisies were for Sana though, to surprise her with the news that she would be coming back for good. She asked to meet by the side entrance of the hospital. Despite them being together as a couple for quite some time, Tzuyu was still a bit shy about public displays of affection, which included giving flowers to Sana -- the most innocent of gestures.

"Why'd you bring me out here?" Sana asked as she wiped a few beads of sweat from her forehead. Walking all the way to the other wing of the hospital was just a ten minute walk or so.

"Ahh, well..." Tzuyu stuttered, handing, nearly shoving, the bouquet to the wide-eyed Sana who accepted it nonetheless with a beaming smile. Who needed the sun's brightness when Tzuyu had Sana? She continued, "Dahyun asked me to buy flowers for Mina's office and I saw the daisies."

"You're such a romantic, Tzu, I didn't know you had it in you," Sana held her by the nape and pulled her in. Tzuyu smiled underneath their kiss.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, let's go."

Mina hadn’t arrived in her office yet which was good because they hadn’t finished preparing. Momo was putting up a self-made banner that wrote “Welcome back, Mina!” in a very cute handwriting (though if Tzuyu were to honestly describe it, it looked like a five year old wrote it). Dahyun set up some light snacks, which she probably bought from a nearby convenience store, and did her best to make it look fancy. Sana was putting up balloons and drew MIna’s face on them and Tzuyu understood why Sana was a doctor and not an illustrator.

The tulips were arranged in a vase Mina kept in her office where a fake plant lived.  _ Sorry, fake plant,  _ Tzuyu thought as she replaced it with the tulips.

The door knob clicked and they all turned their heads to the door as Mina entered her office, looking a bit surprised but her soft smile soon followed.

“Surprise!” Momo yelled out. But they were more surprised to find Mina had changed her hair color to a stunning blonde. It suited her well and she grew out her bangs. Tzuyu had never seen her forehead before.

Dahyun rushed in to give her a big hug and everyone followed. It was a big messy embrace and Tzuyu barely got to hug Mina so she patted her head instead. Dahyun was in tears and Momo just laughed at her. Such a loving relationship.

There was a lot of catching up to do but most of their conversation was centered around the events surrounding the workplace. Any new research findings? Did they change HR policies? Was the leaky faucet in the third floor restroom fixed? Momo practically ate all the snacks Dahyun prepared, arguing that she used her money for it anyway. Mina started shooing everyone out of her office soon after. She had a lot of work to do but promised they could have dinner together. Her treat. Tzuyu wondered if she was even earning income while she was away.

Everyone left her office, Dahyun and Momo went their separate ways and before Tzuyu could make her way to the lecture room for her scheduled class, Sana grabbed her hand and pulled her in for a quick kiss.

“What was that for?” Tzuyu asked shyly when Sana pulled away, her cheeks turning a bright pink.

“I’m just glad I can do this any time now,” Sana chuckled, “Are you settling in fine?”

“Yeah, kind of like riding a bike. Nothing much has changed, I --” Tzuyu stopped when she realized Sana was trailing her fingertips along her arm, wiggling her eyebrows and shooting her a sly smirk. Her eyes were perhaps asking a different question, “I have to attend a lecture in thirty minutes.”

“That’s enough time,” Sana grinned and dragged Tzuyu to the residents’ lounge.

*

“Why did you dye your hair though?” Sana asked, as if that was the most important question.

Mina smirked, “Don’t people change their hair when they undergo a major change?”

The team was at their usual chicken and beer place. The store owner looked a little shocked at Mina’s new hair considering the frequent customer kept the same hairstyle almost all her life.

“What were you doing while you were there?” Dahyun asked curiously.

“I planned on doing nothing actually,” Mina laughed, “I travelled around the island, I probably went to every possible tourist destination. I eventually got bored and decided to take up fishing.”

The idea of Mina fishing seemed ridiculous even for herself. She covered her face in embarrassment as everyone laughed. Mina could do just about anything and be good at it. Even fishing. How did anyone get good at fishing though? She showed them a picture of a fish she caught which was about the length of her forearm. On one occasion, she went diving with some elderly ladies and gathered some oysters. It was a healing experience.

“In all seriousness though,” Sana started, “Why did you leave? Did you even tell Director Park?”

Everyone looked intently at Mina, waiting for her answer. They were more concerned than curious. Mina thought her team deserved to know. They didn’t need to worry about her anymore.

“Firstly, yes, of course, I told Director Park. We talked about it earlier and everything’s fine. I still have my job,” Mina chuckled, “And to answer your other question… To be honest, that car accident changed me in so many ways. But worst of all, I couldn’t get the thoughts that someone died because of something incidental to my actions. I was surrounded by people who really cared about me and I think I was overwhelmed with that love and support. I’ve always had to struggle on my own and when people came along to tell me, ‘It’s okay’ and ‘You can get through this’, it was weird,” Mina shrugged, not meeting their eyes. It was still hard to talk about these things, a little embarrassing even, to let people know that she wasn’t okay, “It felt like I didn’t deserve it. So, I left and I wanted to get better on my own.”

“You’re an idiot, Mi-tan,” Sana said coldly, surprising everyone at the table, even Mina, “You said it yourself. We’re a team. More than just a surgery team. We care about you deeply. Please let us help you when you need it.”

It wasn’t something Mina expected out of Sana. Tzuyu looked like she maybe wanted to push Sana off of her chair after calling Mina an idiot. Sana had the best intentions though, insulting her came from love and affection. Most likely.

“I know,” Mina chuckled, “I’ve realized that I don’t need to fight alone all the time, even when all I’m doing is fighting myself.”

* 

Sana held Tzuyu’s hand as they walked home together, holding the bouquet with her free arm, sniffing them. She thought about how spring nights are made even more beautiful with the woman beside her. Tzuyu seemed a little distracted, looking into the horizon.

“Baby, what’s up?” Sana asked as she tugged her arm.

“Oh, nothing,” Tzuyu said.

“Nothing is never nothing with you,” Sana lightly knocking her girlfriend’s head with her knuckle.

“I was just thinking about how I had to go days without seeing you when I worked in the branch hospital,” Tzuyu chuckled, “I don’t want to sound too clingy or anything. But I really missed you and I’m really glad Mina’s back because it also means we can work together again.”

“Awe, baby,” Sana cooed and pinched Tzuyu’s cheek, “And I thought I’d be the clingy one.”

“Well, that doesn’t mean you aren’t,” Tzuyu tried to play it off coolly but her blush gave her shyness away. “But listen, I was wondering,” she said, her words trailed off a bit, “You know, you live kind of far. My unit’s big enough for two. They even allow pets --”

“You want to adopt me as your pet?” Sana laughed and began acting like a puppy putting her hands up like paws and nuzzling her head on Tzuyu’s neck.

“Not in those exact words… Do you want to move in with me?” Tzuyu asked, looking as flushed as ever, “You don’t have to. But the real estate market is really bad and at the rate you’re paying, it’s not worth living alone.”

“You’re serious?” Sana smiled from ear to ear, “And you’re seriously using the real estate market as your best selling pitch?”

“Did it work?”

Maybe she was just a bit intoxicated from the beer or the daisies or just the fact that she couldn’t get enough of Tzuyu in a day, but Sana found herself agreeing instantly to one of the biggest possible changes to her life. They had come a long, long way and there was nothing stopping them anymore. Even though Tzuyu was always a bit wary about taking on big steps in their relationship, she was now the one initiating a major change.

“I’d love to save money and be cost efficient with you,” Sana giggled and kissed Tzuyu lightly on her lips.

*

Chaeyoung spun around Mina's swivel chair in her office, waiting for her to return after their team dinner. She never let anyone sit on it though, but Chaeyoung was feeling a little disobedient.

It was the first day she returned to the hospital and she had a pile of paperwork to do. Her desk was a mess but everything else remained as she left it. A little penguin figurine wearing a red scarf next to her pen holder. A bobble head hula girl from Momo who made her place it on her desk even though it was completely tacky and against Mina’s good style. The eiffel tower paperweight was atop a bunch of files but it didn’t really need to be there since the files weren’t going to fly off anywhere. There was a new addition to her random trinkets though. A photograph of Mina and herself in the Ulleungdo pier, taken the day after she found her. It was the only other framed photograph on her desk besides one of Mina and her aunt on a hiking trip.

"You're sitting in my chair," Mina commented as she entered her office. Chaeyoung looked up to face her and smiled mischievously.

"I have taken over your kingdom and I'm claiming it now," Chaeyoung lightly knocked over the eiffel tower and placed her hands on the arm rests, tapping the surface playfully.

"You dare challenge the owner of this throne?" Mina smirked as she sat on Chaeyoung's lap.

Chaeyoung wrapped her arms around Mina's waist, not at all worried if the chair could support their weight or not (okay, she was a little worried but they were quite small… at least, she was, though she would never admit it). She rested her head against Mina’s chest, listening to the beat of her heart, knowing that it beats not just for Mina herself but for her as well.

_ “You saved me, you know?” Mina said as Chaeyoung and Nayeon waited for the ferry to arrive. _

_ “How so?” _

_ Mina shook her head, her blonde hair flowing with the movements. Why she hadn’t changed hairstyles was a question Chaeyoung would have to ask someday because this one really suited her, “I’ve been so engrossed in my own thoughts. It felt like I’ve been stuck in my head, in my own world, and that’s a really dark place to stay. But you keep trying to bring me out. To the extent that you tracked me down to this island and told me to fuck off in rage,” Mina smiled, thinking back at their moment by the pebble beach, “I really appreciate everything you do for me. I’m sorry for trying to keep you out... I’ll let you save me from now on.” _

_ Chaeyoung held her hand and chuckled, “Look at you, doc, telling me I’m the one saving lives.” She rubbed circles on the back of Mina’s hand, “We can talk about everything that goes on in your head. I’ll never look at you any different. I’ll never feel any differently about you, MIna. Just promise me you’ll go back.” _

_ “I promise.” _

_ She raised her hand up and lifted her pinky finger but Mina just stared at her. Had she never made a pinky promise before? Chaeyoung raised her eyebrow, “It’s called a pinky swear.” _

_ “I know,” Mina laughed as she linked her pinky with Chaeyoung’s. She pulled her in for a kiss, slow and sweet, just before the ferry’s horn blasted throughout the pier. That was their cue to leave. _

_ “God, please stop it! This is a public place!” Nayeon whined. But she couldn’t hide the fact that she was happy to see them together again. _

Chaeyoung held no collateral against Mina's promise to come back. Just trust. It didn't take long for her to return after they left the island. Or maybe it did. Chaeyoung never really paid attention since she stopped counting the days. Her hours no longer dragged on, no longer dependent on the next letter that might or might not arrive. She didn’t really realize that spring was in bloom until today when she saw the tulips in Mina’s office. Timely for the seasons to pass, she thought.

She finally found her. She felt complete and fulfilled, as if everything was as it should be. Chaeyoung looked up, meeting Mina’s soft eyes. They had never looked calmer.

“Let’s go home. You must be tired.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing this T.T Thank you for the love for this story! Let me know what you think of the story! Is the ending satisfying? Was there anything lacking or something you want more of? How do you find my writing uwu? I would love to know how I could improve! Would you like to read about other ships? Hmmm.
> 
> Follow me on twitter @trash_for_twice if you want to discuss the story or anything at all! If you have some requests/commissions, I won't bite! Would also greatly appreciate any support through ko-fi (please check the link on my twitter profile). Thank you for everything, internet!


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